July 2019 landed with the onslaught of eclipse season, six planets in retrograde AND one of them being Mercury.
The weather has been HOT, and the ethereal environment like walking barefoot across burning tarmac during an earthquake.
A hot sticky mess as the heat from our buried past and unconsciousness rises up to the surface.
Sounds pretty dark and ominous when I say that, but actually, it’s all been heart opening stuff ready for the New Moon in Leo.
A courageous passionate fire sign, Leo's aren't fearless, they are just more driven by the fire in their heart - despite the fear.
Leo is the Strength card in the Tarot, but true strength is found in vulnerability. Thanks to The Queen of Vulnerability herself Dr Brene Brown, most of us already know that the word courage comes from the French word “couer” meaning heart and here’s where we have it!
Leo rules the heart, and the bravest thing we can do is open our heart to the world knowing that sometimes it’s going to be trashed, but still that’s better than never living or loving at all (even though you may try, it’s like a half hearted attempt through a crack in a doorway.)
In fact we spend so much time in fear of this inevitability, that so much energy goes into trying to block it rather than open it. Even in the so called “spiritual” world.
In this post I may say some courageous but controversial things (after all I am a Leo)
I might say things that challenge or upset the status quo, things about where I really think the darkness lurks in the “spiritual” world and it’s not Mercury Retrograde (which turns direct just before this Moon by the way), nor is it in the dark shadow that crosses the Moon or Sun in an Eclipse, or a Death card flipped over in a Tarot reading.
To explain this I need to go back to the eclipse on the 3rd July.
At the time Mercury was revving up to go retrograde - bringing things up from the past.
PING! I got a message from a friend in Mexico that I hadn’t heard from for a long time.
“Tiffany, when are you coming back?”
Some of you may not know in 2016 I did a Shirley Valentine, but to Mexico instead of Greece. And for those that don’t know what a “Shirley Valentine” is the name of a film about a middle aged woman having a mid life crisis, leaving her husband and life, and jetting off on a plane.
I landed in the Yucutan Penisulsa of Mexico in the gulf of caribbean.
A lonely heartbroken Leo (a very sad sight) in absolute paradise.
I still loved my husband, my family, my cat, my home. But I made some great memories and two Mexican friends, friends I’d not really been in touch with much since, but now one was calling me to come back.
If it was any other time I would have said “one day” but this time things had lined up for me to say “In the New Year! I’m going to hold a Past Life and Mayan Astrology New Year Retreat in Tulum!”
I didn’t know that by the way!
A few days later by my other Mexican friend messaged me also out of the blue asking me to read Tarot for him. I told him I taught now, I no longer read.
He explained that he wanted me to read Tarot for him because a reader had told his mum he was going to have an accident.
Instantly felt my blood boil towards the reader and calmed it by remembering not to judge and that I only had the information about the very end of the situation.
Never the less I told him that was exactly why I didn’t read anymore, because people want predictions and then need another prediction to counteract the prediction and that it’s a complete toxic mess, thus I teach “The Transformational Truth of Tarot” and yes I train readers, and I train readers RIGHT from the start.
Tarot is known quite often as a fortune-telling divinatory tool, a predictive tool. It's what the common vision or view of Tarot is out there, and I'm kinda into dispelling that.
The Tarot is merely a mirror.
What do I mean by this?
There are two ways to use the Tarot. One is predicatively, and the other is as a mirror. The Tarot shows you your patterning. We're all predictive, we're all patterned, we're all conditioned. So when you go to see a reader, they will either use that reflection to predict or to reflect it back at you.
My brand is The Transformational Truth of Tarot, as are my books, as is my game, as is my courses and so on. I had a "past life" in this life of being a Tarot reader for some of the top London companies, conveyor belt readings, on and off the TV. And before then I had my very own enlightening past with the Tarot, shall we say.
I have always understood it to be a mirror, well no, that's not true!
Since my 20s, before then I thought it was a predictive tool and it was a painful path.
Then when I really started to understand what it was about, I was working as a reader and nearly everyone who came to me didn't understand what it was about. They were wanting those predictive things, and it was very painful, again.
There was only one thing for it.
I had to come away and I had to launch my own brand, The Transformational Truth of Tarot.
There are two ways of working with Tarot, predictive or reflective.
Here’s a story about when I was at one of those top London companies, about how I really got the message of the danger of seeing it as a predictive tool over being a mirror.
Sat there in my office the phone rang, on the end of the phone was a distraught lady who I'd seen a few times before, and I’d also seen her husband, separately, not together, but they both used to come for readings.
This day she rang up totally distraught, "he's gonna finish it, "he's gonna finish it, he's so gonna finish it."
I did the reading and I couldn't see a split anywhere, there was not one single card that suggested a split.
I was totally confused because it was my early days of reading. And although I had some understanding of it as a mirror, I wasn't strong enough or firm enough in that message. So I just said, "I can't see anything here about a split."
If that happened now I would say "okay, this is just a mirror showing me how much you want to stay together." And she probably would have said, "well yes I know that!" '
Cause this is the other thing when people come for readings, they're like "well, you're not telling me "anything I don't already know"!
And that’s exactly why it says "Know Thyself" over the Temple of Delphi rather than...
"Cross my palm with silver "... and you will meet a tall, dark, handsome stranger."
The most wisest and ancient philosophers said to "know thyself" is the most important thing that you could ever do with your life and also the hardest thing, and this is where Tarot comes in. It's power, really.
The next day, her husband came to me and sat down and said "I know you read for her yesterday, "and I know it said that there was no split, "but I just thought that I'd come along "and see what happens when I sit in front of you." so I was like "okay." And I dealt the cards out, and as much as hers said "no split", was as much as his said "split."
Done, that's it. It was two massive extremes. And I looked at him and I said: "I get it."
"She really doesn't want the split, "and you really do want the split."
And he said, "yep, that's right."
And they split because obviously, it takes two.
It just goes to show, we're only ever reading for one person, we're only ever able to really tune in to their thoughts, their feelings, their fears, their desires. It is a mirror because what they want they have a certain degree of influence on, but if there are other people as well (and no wo/man is an island), then that also has another mirror…
And all of a sudden you're in a hall of mirrors.
Trying to predict in that is actually total and utter madness and that’s where the darkness is.
That’s ONLY one of the many stories and examples I could give you as to why I am so passionate about spreading The Transformational Truth of Tarot and dispelling the toxicity of prediction. But what’s this got to do with the New Moon in Leo?
Earlier I said that we spend a lot of our energy trying to protect our heart rather than finding the courage to open it come what may.
Earlier I warned that I would say some controversial things here it goes, and it’s probably no secret anyway that....
Personally I view prediction to be toxic ... why you say?
Because it breeds addiction, attachment, obsession and compulsion.
And it’s not the only thing! Cue reply from my Mexican friend about why I don’t read predictively.
“Okay, I get it, and what're your thoughts on twin flames?”
Now it may also now come to no surprise that I view the Twin Flame Theory to be toxic as well!
“Twin flames? Toxic!”
Same reason ….. it breeds addiction, attachment, obsession and compulsion.
In fact NOT ONLY THAT!
It also has a tendency to make people discount the spirit in anyone else apart from their “one twin flame”.
It’s Namaste reversed.
You are connected to everyone and everything, life is a mirror, and truly living it is about learning to honour it all, every single connection to everyone and everything with the same manner of grace.
Another name for the tarot is the book of life.
Learning to see the spiritual connection in each and every one of us, whether that be through Tarot or something else, well that can only be a good thing…
Nor does it mean I discount the theory of soul mates...
Some of you may not knowI am also a qualified Past Life Regression Therapist - here comes another story…
One day a lady came for a Past Life Regression because of lack of self-worth.
As her past life unfolded, we traced it back to her not being able to save a close family member, how useless and guilty she felt. From there she was always rescuing others, but feeling trapped (and racked with guilt for feeling that way).
When she spoke of her passing she described “hell.” There she said she spent 40 years before reincarnating today — to be given the chance to truly love.
Her failure to love herself or others truly was obviously a self-punishing prison of hell, whether symbolic or literal who knows (it’s the first time I have had a client go to hell). Her own sense of worthlessness kept her heart blocked and she knew if she didn’t want to go back to hell she must learn to truly love herself first.
Then something very strange happened. I asked her where she was and she replied:
“In a little village called Liss.”
Shocks and bolts passed up and down my spine as she mentioned my hometown.
When she came round, I asked her if she knew that there was indeed a little village called Liss?
“No” she replied.
She was from China, so I believed her as not many people even in the UK have heard of “Liss.”
“Well, you don’t need Google it to verify it exists because it’s my hometown” was my response as I handed a stunned lady the notes.
I don’t know what you make of all this.
There was a time when I didn’t believe in past lives, and then I walked into a church and saw him.
Week after week I saw him, sometimes we were dressed in the same colours from head to toe which sparked a look of acknowledgement and a smile, but never a word.
I tried to carry on with my life like everything was still the same, but nothing was.
Then it happened, I transported to another time, another place.
“Where am I?” I thought and much to my surprise I got an actual answer:
In shock at the direct hotline I had dialled into I asked question after question. I got my name (Catherine Burgh) the date (1610). I was in a stately home that had its own church, I saw him and what happened. I came round and Googled it. There were four stately homes in Lincoln (UK) in 1610, but only one housed the Burgh family, and it was the only one that had a church in the grounds called St Peter’s (the name of the church where I met him).
By this time I was going slightly mad, I couldn’t cope with these internal feelings that were overpowering me. I left my business, my long term relationship, and my home — all within a week. All for a stranger I had never even spoken to in this life, yet I knew so well that I could tell you where he was and what he was doing every moment of the day (later to be confirmed when I found the courage to finally talk to him).
However, it soon became clear that I was in love with who he was 400 years ago, rather than who he is today.
That experience turned my belief around.
I trained to be a Past Life Regressionist, and over the last decade it’s something I have learned to live with — the recognition of others and helping myself and others with confusing connections.
So in the spirit of true Mercury Retrograde, I'm repurposing my blog from 9th May 2018 - The SoulMate Connection - 10 Things I’ve learnt.
1. We truly are one
Everyone you meet (and don’t meet) has an impact. Some more so than others. A tree has clusters of leaves on the same branch, and clusters of other leaves that branch off that branch and so on.Just like that, we have clusters of souls (commonly referred to as soul groups).
2. Allow yourself to feel the energy
When you meet someone from your soul group, the feeling is completely confusing and all-consuming. Your consciousness tells you they are a stranger, whilst your unconsciousness rejoices at the reunion.
It also knows that it means something big in your life is about to kick off — projected into your consciousness as fear. You know nothing will ever be the same again yet you can’t recall the past, so you have no idea what it all means.
You just feel the energy pulsating all the way through you, uncontrollably.
3. What is happening is an activation of the soul contract that was made
Let’s go back to the tree. Say one day you are strolling along a different branch, soul searching about what you need to learn in your next life and suddenly you realize that you need to learn forgiveness.
So you ask the souls you come across if they would help you learn forgiveness, and they say, “No way! I am not messing up my karma for you!”
But then you turn a corner, and you see David. You and David have lived many lives together before and the feeling of connection between you is profound. David knows he has to learn not to care about what others think of him. These lessons resulting from your soul contract last time around.
Something happened, you blamed him and he was racked with guilt. Yet, when you meet on the branch, the feeling of love is profound. You understand the depth of how you are serving each other and the love that it’s motivated by, and so you do the deal — to reincarnate at the same time and meet up.
4. The cycle repeats
The meeting happens, the soul contract is activated and you pick up from where you left off — except you have no conscious memory of where you left off, so it’s incredibly easy to “let's go round again.”
5. Make a physical connection
The most powerful synchronicities you will ever encounter lay sprinkled around you each and every time you meet in the physical world (Skype and emails dilute this experience).
There is something about the physical connection that fuses like dynamite; the magic within bursts out into fireworks of serendipity — it’s enough to drive you insane with “what does this mean?”
6. They will help you to grow
Add to that the profoundly intense connection and we get the common misunderstanding that this type of love means they are your one true love, your “soulmate.”
What a “soulmate” is, first and foremost is a mate of your soul.
They are going to do things that challenge your human life, mind, human heart, body and ego. All in the name of helping your soul to evolve.
That’s the bottom line.
7. There will always be a theme
The role of a soulmate changes through eternity, they could have been your brother, your sister, your lover, your father, your mother etc… and so, at times when you are with them in this life, you will feel the dynamics of all these roles, the feelings between you can be ever-changing and incredibly confusing.
However, there tends to be a theme that stays the same. This is the contract to work on.
8. The soul contract themes are intense
Sometimes you just can’t honour the contract.
Sometimes you have to wave the white flag and say “I’ve learned all I can for this lifetime.” Sometimes it just feels way too blocked, loaded or stuck to progress.
9. Time will heal
That experience feels like it shatters not only your heart — but your soul too.
It can invoke a crippling pain that takes on even physical symptoms that only you know about. Like a bomb that went off in your insides, your own supernova implosion. The invisible walking wounded who just went through a war no-one ever knew about.
However much this hurts, one day you wake up and all feels new again because with time (eternal) everything heals.
10. Keep an open mind
If you do one thing let it be this: Help yourself by practising non-judgment.
One thing I have learned is that judgment is the block to love and evolution. Judgment about what they did to you, or about how you should be able to make this work. One life is a drop in the ocean of a sea of history between you; how can you really know better than the divine plan and divine timing?
The real issue at hand is small-minded thinking and the aeons of pain that has been brought up by the meeting. Be gentle with yourself, be gentle with the connection, allow the divine plan of space and divine timing to do its thing.
Time really is the greatest healer, sometimes in the same life time you will come back together again and feel like you are working through on the next level, this feeling is so beautiful it’s one of the best things life ever truly has to offer you — it’s the whole point of it.
A final note on this New Moon in Leo, it’s time for a new open hearted start. What does that mean exactly?
Well it doesn’t mean niavely telling everyone you love them, as Dr Brene Brown says, people have to earn your vulnerability.
What it does mean is loving yourself enough to know you will live and love yourselfe through whatever is challenging you at the moment, you’ve lived through much worse, believe me...
If you are intrigued by the following:
1. The thought of discovering your own past lives so you can come to peace with any obsessive-compulsive toxic connections.
2. Opening your heart to feel the divine connection with one and all through a Cacao ceremony.
3. Understanding and knowing that “divine timing” is a true concept through learning Past Life Regression and Mayan Astrology.
4. And even train up to the level of accredited Past Life Regressionist whilst on a Caribbean beach in Mexico this New Year.
Then i’d suggest embracing living bravely by getting on the waiting list for my newest Retreat..
There is an early bird saving of around £250 but it’s in a fast flight of 24 hours only.
When you join the waiting list you won’t be joining my list, only registering your interest for the retreat.
The earlybird offer is only there for 24 hours, and you have to be on the list to get it - there will be a payment plan option to help you spread the cost.
This is going to be an incredible heart opening retreat in an incredible heart opening land...
Mexico gave me what I needed to return with my heart open and live hapily ever after with my husband, step daughter and my cat <3)
Get on the waiting list to recieve the exclusive only once Early Bird VIP invite!
Big open hearted love,